Wannan na É—aya daga cikin jerin rubuce-rubucen da Zauren Markazus Sunna ke samarwa kan batutuwa daban-daban da suka shafi rayuwar al’umma. A wannan karon rubutun ya shafi “Bambancin Sha’awa Da Soyayya” wanda Baban Manar AlÆ™asim ya rubuta.
Bambancin Sha'awa Da Soyayya (Kashi na 08)
Baban Manar Alƙasim
So ko ƙauna in dai za
a sami musayarsu a tsakanin juna sun zama soyayya kenan, wannan ba baƙon abu ba ne a
wurin kowa, don haka dai mutum ya fara tunanin wace iriyar soyayya zai yi? Kuma
da wa zai yi? Tabbatacciyar soyayya daban take da kowace iriyar soyayya, don
ita akan nemi yardar Allah ne a ciki, ba wai wani amfani da mutum zai samu ba,
a taƙaice dai tabbatacciyar soyayya takan kasu kashi
uku, duk yadda aka rasa daya to ba ta cika kamar yadda ya kamata a kira ta,
kuma masu yin ta ko sun nuna suna jin dadi akwai matsala, ta nan take ko a
bayan wani lokaci kadan.
1) Abu na farko dai ya kasance ana neman yardar
Allah ne a ciki, mutum ya tambayi zuciyarsa dalilin da ya sa yake son ya
kusanci jinsin da ba na sa, da irin yadda yake son kusantar ta kasance, in ya
kasance akwai saba wa shari'ar Allah, to ya san cewa akwai matsala a tafiyar,
ba yadda za ka saba wa Allah kuma ka ci nasara a lamarin da kake so, kenan
yaudara ba ta da amfani, kar mutum ya kusanci wani jinsi bayan yana da tabbacin
ba zai iya rayuwa da shi ba, yin haka yaudara ne.
2) Sannan yardar mutane, wannan yana da matuƙar mahimmanci a
rayuwarmu ta yau, masamman musulmi, kafin wani ya fara magana da mace ya
tabbatar uwayensa za su ba shi damar shaƙuwa da ita, sau
da yawa samari sukan yi kuskure, ba sa tuntubar mahaifansu sai sun gama ƙulla soyayyarsu
gaba daya, in ta zo da matsala kuma uwayen na su su ƙi amince musu,
sai ka ga soyayyar ta shiga watangariri, a ƙarshe a bar
yarinyar da kuka, wata ƙila ma ta wulaƙanta wani da
yake mutuwar ƙaunarta sabo da wannan, ga shi shi ma zai bar ta
wai zai bi abin da uwayensa suka ce. A zahirin gaskiya duk wani da na gari dole
ya ji maganar mahaifansa, kuskuren na bangarorin ne guda biyu, me ya sa bai
nemi yardar mahaifansa ba kafin ya fara maganarta? Wani lokacin ma ba daga
wurinsa ba ne, daga wurin mahaifan yarinyar ne, sai ta gama shaƙuwa da shi su
ce ba su yarda ba, a nan neman yardar kowa tabbas wajibi ne, a ganina har ƙawaye da abokai
akwai buƙatar gamsar da su in dai ana son abu ya yi kyau,
saurayi ya gamsar da su cewa ita ta kirki ce, kuma su gani a aikace, ita ma ta
gamsar da ƙawayenta, shi kuma ya yi ƙoƙarin ganin bai
kunyata ta ba.
3) Sai kuma neman yardar kai: Wato dai mutum ya
gamsar da kansa cewa tabbas wance ta dace da rayuwata, ya kamata muhadu a
matsayin jiki daya wajen gina zuriya ta ƙwarai, wannnan
ba abu ne da za a yi shi a dan lokaci ba, don mutum yana da buƙatar bincike
mai zurfi a kankansa, ta wurin gamsar da kansa kan cewa wace ya gani ta dace da
shi a tsarin halitta, kala, iya wanka, dabi'u, ilimi da zamantakewa gami da
fahimtar juna, gaggawar duba abu daya kawai takan kai mutum ga nadama. Duk
yadda mace ta kai da riƙo da addini, ko shahara a wurin musabaƙar Al'Ƙur'ani in dai
ka ga a dabi'ance ko surance ba ta yi maka ba, to na fi ba ka shawarar ka dan
saurara har sai ka sami mai addinin da za ta yi maka, kuma ta gamsar da kar
abin da kake nema, wannan don samun tabbatacciyar soyayya ne mai dorewa, in ba
don haka ba Annabi ba zai ba sahabinsa shawarar ya je ya ga matar da farko ba.
Da wannan nake ganin ita ma abokiyar soyayyar akwai
buƙatar ta gamsu
da saurayin, koda yake mata ƙaramin dalili yakan gamsar da su su amince da
namiji, kuma su so shi so na gaskiya, na ga wata Baturiya 'yar kasar Sweden da
ta auri wani dan Sudan ta haifa masa 'ya'ya shida, kuma ta bar ƙasarta mai ƙanƙara, ta tare a
Sudan mai bala'in zafi, da aka tambaye ta me ta gani a wurinsa, ta gamsu da ta
canja ƙasarta, addininta, al'adarta, suturarta da
abincinta? Da bude bakinta sai ta ce wallahi ba wani dalili katamaimai, kawai
ta fahimci yana son ya kusance ta ne kuma ta ba shi ƙofa, duk kuwa
da saninta da cewa talaka ne, kuma baƙi, to tunda ta
yarda, yanzu komai masoyinta yake so shi take so, haihuwa kuwa sai dai in Allah
bai kawo ba.
Na gamsu ƙwarai da
dalilinta, don sai ta yi shekaru ba ta ko yi maganar 'yan uwanta ba, bare ta
sanya wa kanta cewa wata rana za ta gudu ta bar shi, soyayya ta gaskiya ba ta
kasancewa kwatsam daga mutum ya ga dan uwansa shi kenan ya mace masa, wannan
dai yakan zama daya daga cikin dalilan da suke janyo hankalin mutum, amma
soyayya kam a hankali ake gina ta har ta kammala, zan iya cewa kafin mutum ya
kutsa cikin dausayin soyayya yana buƙatar abu uku,
da zarar sun kammala sai ya nemi yardar Allah, sannan yardar kansa da ta
mutane, kawai ya ci gaba. A nan zan dakata. Sai mun haÉ—u a rubutu na
gaba.
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HAUSA: Kuna iya rubuto mana tsokaci ko tambayoyi a ƙasa. Tsokacinku game da abubuwan da muke ɗorawa shi zai tabbatar mana cewa mutane suna amfana da wannan ƙoƙari da muke yi na tattaro muku ɗimbin ilimummuka a wannan kafar intanet.