"I am becoming my mother" by Sumayya Jaeh

The Poet 

Sumayya Jaeh is a writer, program manager and an artpreneur. She is the curator of Untu Art Gallery. She specialises in contemporary arts in Nigeria, and actively participates in the curation of art exhibitions.

She is a fellow of the Kashim Ibrahim Fellowship and a fellow of Arts Managers and Literary Activists Network (AMLA)

She worked part time as a Program Officer at the Yasmin El-Rufai Foundation where She was instrumental in their Creative Writing Program.

She has experience in supporting the delivery, monitoring and tracking of programs. 

She has knowledge of the Nigerian art sector, as the Creative Director for Open Arts, a literary collective hub she co-founded to use art as a form of expression in northern Nigeria. Summaya has been invited to a panel at the Minna Books and Arts Festival as well as the one time Ahmadu Bello University Day of Literature. She has participated at the Kaduna Book and Arts Festival, the 2019 Ake Book and Arts festival and the Kaduna Fashion and Arts Festival.

The Poem 

I am becoming my mother 

I wear my mother’s smile, it spreads from her lips to my mouth

Her eyes sit on my face, a summer sky clear with vivid pastel hues of our emotions. 

my mother's laffaya I stole wraps her curves on me, like a hug, like my mother’s hug soft, firm and secured.

 

I am becoming my mother

Ba komai slips from my tongue, as it does on her tongue and her mother's tongue. 

My teeth sink into my emotions 

I chew on goro, the yellow bitter caffeine juice wash over my tongue a bad taste we enjoy like our choice in men. It leaves an orange hue on my mouth, my mother’s teeth and our lives. 

 

I am becoming my mother 

The years living it’s prints on my tumbi 

On smile lines on my face, a map of a life lived, my laughter, my frown and the bowl of my mother's tuwo on me.

 

I am my mother

I am mothering me, in the soft cajole to get out of bed, in my voice, in my head in the prattle of voices echoing ‘I am proud of you’, ‘you can do this,’ ‘you’ve got this.’ ‘You know seeing him is not good for you.’ ‘Get up.’ ‘Ba komai.’

It is in love, reward myself, yogurt a, a fish reward for hardwork. 

A spread of gold into my skin

 

I am my mother’s mother 

When the weight of life weighs her, i hold her in my arms.

I rob my mother’s feet and her back and lull her to sleep. 

I chase away the anxieties lurking underneath the bed that leave her awake at  night. 

 

I am becoming my mother

A mother before a mother. 

My mother, and her mother.